Getting divorced can be one of the most traumatic and devastating events in your life, especially if you are suddenly a single father who has to pick up the pieces of your life for your kids. You may be feeling betrayed, confused, angry, and fearful of the future. It’s understandable to feel this way, but you don’t have to let it control you. It’s important to prioritize your mental health for your kids’ sake. A Kansas divorce lawyer can help you figure out a plan.

Getting Divorced in Kansas

Regardless of whether your divorce is contested or uncontested, the result is still likely to be unpleasant for you. After all, you’re ending your marriage, which is something you probably never thought you would have to do. Now, you’re figuring out life as a single father and being present for your kids, which may include dodging a contentious ex and teaching your kids how to adjust to a new normal that you are only just starting to figure out for yourself.

Your divorce is going to impact not just your life but the lives of everyone around you, particularly your kids. You will have to figure out how to co-parent with your ex, with whom you may no longer get along, depending on your divorce situation. It’s important that you exercise your fathers’ rights when you can. You shouldn’t let the court try to minimize your involvement as a parent simply because you’re a father. Fathers have parental rights, too.

According to information gathered by the CDC, the divorce rate in Kansas as of 2022 is only 1.9 per 1,000 residents. That means Kansas has a lower divorce rate compared to most of the country, substantially lower than the national divorce rate. Many men involved in these divorces are single fathers who have to figure out unique ways to cope after their marriages end. If you’re struggling, you may want to reach out to a local support group, such as DivorceCare.

Important Divorce Tips for Fathers

When you find yourself dealing with a divorce you may not have expected, you can end up becoming so concerned about the larger aspects like asset division, child custody, and spousal support that you may forget to deal with certain things that may be unique to fatherhood. It’s vital to your adjustment as a single father that you consistently prioritize your continued mental and emotional health by taking care of yourself.

Here are some tips on how to do that post-divorce:

  • Focus on your support system. You may experience a great deal of trauma getting divorced. It can be hard to adjust to living the single life again, especially as a parent. Surround yourself with people who choose to be there for you. Friends, family, neighbors, and even coworkers can be a consistent source of love and comfort as you focus on adjusting your life to a new normal.
  • Don’t be afraid to establish clear boundaries. Your former spouse needs to know that you are committed to moving on. You may only wish to view them as a co-parent whom you sometimes need to see for the sake of your kids. Beyond that, you are under no obligation to spend time with them, help them out, or even communicate with them. Make that clear from the start. You may wish to be cordial one day, but right now, you should prioritize your peace without them.
  • Make your own long-term goals. There’s nothing wrong with prioritizing your own happiness. When you’re happy, your kids are happy too. Setting some long-term goals for yourself can give you something to strive towards and help take your mind off things. Start saving for a family vacation with your kids, start hitting the gym more regularly, or even start dating again. Your goals are your own.

FAQs

Q: Do I Really Need a Lawyer for My Divorce?

A: Yes, you should really consider hiring a lawyer to represent you throughout your divorce. Depending on whether your divorce is contested or uncontested, you may find a lawyer’s help to be indispensable. The last thing you want is to find yourself unprepared as you go up against a seasoned divorce lawyer in court with no legal help of your own. The right lawyer can make all the difference.

Q: How Does Equitable Distribution Work?

A: In Kansas, marital assets are distributed through equitable distribution. This method ensures that each spouse receives as fair a settlement as possible. Many times, fair and equal are not synonymous. To ensure each spouse receives a fair amount of the assets, the court considers many different factors, including each spouse’s contributions to the marriage, the total length of the marriage, and each spouse’s current financial situation.

Q: How Is Custody Decided in Kansas?

A: In Kansas, child custody is largely decided by the court. Both parents can work out a custody arrangement together and present it to the court. The judge can consider the arrangement, but they will ultimately make a decision about custody that prioritizes whatever is right for the child in question. The child’s welfare is the chief concern. The court may even ignore each parent’s wishes to focus on the child’s well-being.

Q: Why Should I Get Divorced?

A: There’s no real easy way to answer that question. Everybody’s choice to get married is their own, just as their choice to get divorced is also their own. People who get divorced are influenced by several unique factors. Never let anybody try to convince you that your choices and feelings don’t matter. If you believe that all the love or trust has vanished from your marriage, you shouldn’t feel guilty about ending it.

Contact a Divorce Lawyer Today

It can be difficult for single fathers to navigate their divorce while also trying to be a present parent for their kids. If you are struggling with your own divorce, you may want to reach out to an experienced divorce lawyer who can help you figure out a path forward.

At Stange Law Firm, we can help you determine your next steps while also ensuring you aren’t taken advantage of in your divorce. Contact us to speak with a valued team member about your case.